The sun was shining brightly as I headed south towards Milton Keynes for this 1st round tie, a hugely momentous occasion for the away side Nantwich Town, who I had encountered in the previous round. Memories of 2 weeks ago were still fresh in my memory as I drove along the A5 all the way to Britain's last 'new city' and possessing a ticket in the away end of the ground, I was full of optimism and anticipation of a cup upset of David v Goliath proportions. It turned out that I wasn't alone, hundreds of Nantwich fans making the journey south for the biggest game in their clubs history, and who could blame them.
The setting for this scene of anticipated giant killing possessed nothing of the traditional beauty of the northern market town. Milton Keynes at best, can be described as a bold attempt to create a socialist paradise in Britain, at worst, an artificial, fake amalgamation of concrete and roundabouts. The Stadiummk effectively symbolises the city's lack of identity and culture. It is undoubtedly huge, with plenty of space around the edge for car parks. There is a nice little walkway from the stadium going to the nearest Asda. Upon gaining entry to the stadium, you find yourself on a sheltered concourse area that spans the length of the stadium, splitting the two tiers in half. The seats are clean, spacious and very comfortable. Every penny has been spent to ensure the comfort, health and safety of the many spectators in the venue. Yet this is where the problems begin.
There are no fans.
The stadium can hold up to 20,000 people, and incredibly, there are plans to use the upper tier to increase capacity to 32,000. Yet on Saturday, the day of the 1st Round of the greatest cup competition on earth, only 4,000 odd fans were in attendance. True, the local authorities are hoping to use the stadium for other events such as music concerts and other sports, which is just as well. There was a shocking lack of atmosphere throughout the entire game. It almost seemed like the home fans were continuing the minutes silence throughout the whole first half.
The Nantwich crowd however, were showing no signs of laxity towards the experience. They were vocal, dressed in absurd clothes and wearing funny hats and genuinely having a good time. In fact, they provided as much entertainment as the game itself.
Nantwich certainly started brightly, and for 10 minutes it actually seemed as if our pre game optimism could realistically be transferred to those on the pitch. MK were always going to be the better team however, and it took them just half an hour to go two goals ahead, both goals coming from some slick passing from midfield, which Nantwich failed to cope with. At half time, I already knew who I would be following in the next round.
The second half brought little respite for the Dabbers, any hopes of a comeback were dramatically dashed by a freekick soon after the restart. From then on it was merely a case of counting down the minutes until the end, though it was heartening to see Nantwich, unburdened by the pressure of being within a chance, actually having a go. The problem was that MK were just too quick and sharp for them, a fact demonstrated by the last two goals as they merely soaked up any Dabber pressure, and calved them open on the counter attack.
It was at this moment that I decided to turn my attentions to what was going on in the stands. Not the MK end of course, they were all asleep, but the lively section of Nantwich fans in front of me behind the goal. I had noticed at various points throughout the game that members of the MK Safety Team had been circling round the group, pointing and wagging various fingers with concerned looks on their faces. At one point, a member of a safety team waded into the crowd, and appeared to have a disagreement with a bloke who to all intents and purposes looked like he had the word 'HOOLIGAN' on his forehead. Another Safety Team member, I don't know his name but shall refer to him as Captain Jobsworth, told a fan several times to stop smoking.
All this was very lighthearted, but things started to get a little more serious as the group of fans, no doubt aggrieved by their teams poor showing, began to take their frustrations out on a certain member of the Safety Team. This guy was the wrong side of chubby, a fact no doubt taken into consideration by the group, who began a superb rendition of "Have You Ever Seen Your Dick", pointing to the guy in question.
This again was quite funny, until two of the fans, including Hooligan Boy I have previously mentioned, incredibly started fighting each other. The Safety Team wasted no time in wading on in there, determined to sniff out the offending imbeciles, and they swiftly hauled them out, one by one amid much raucous laughter and jeering. Though Captain Jobsworth was watching from the sidelines, the real hero of the hour was the fat guy who they had been singing to moments before, grabbing several fans by the throat and literally dragging them out. In all, about ten fans were evicted.
This whole incident lasted merely 10 minutes, yet it was easily the most entertaining period of the 2nd half, though MK had dominated proceedings, it was a shame that their fans had not turned out in droves to make a real atmosphere. For Nantwich and their fans, it had no doubt been a memorable occasion, albeit one that ended with the inevitable conclusion, a 6-0 drubbing. Still, history had been made for them, I am sure they will savour the experience for years to come.
For Milton Keynes, a tie away at Barnet awaits them, and one can only hope that their fans will experience a proper atmosphere there, and maybe pick up some tips.
